this is the only food critic I’ll accept at my restaurant.
Feeding your animals (safe) but new-to-them foods is botha great source of enrichment for the and endless hilarity for you. I reccomend green beans because they’re unwieldly for them to eat so its an involved process.
Tag: like seriously???
Never forget the time my elementary school tried to do some sexist bullshit where they said only girls could go on the swing set and only boys could play on the jungle gym. Every single child was pissed off and saying it wasn’t fair. That was the first day of school and it didn’t even last five minutes.
LGBTQ+ scholarship: You must be out of the closet to be eligible.
Me: This is homophobic because it inconveniences me.
My mom’s a massive bitch. She knew I had to take a package to staples because my rentals are due and she fucking had a hissy fit and left me at the house.
Sunshine and Shit Jokes 